“Be a lamp, or a ladder, or a lifeboat.  Help someone’s soul heal.” {Rumi}

Infertility Counselling

As women, we are born with an innate desire to nurture and create our own family. Fertility challenges can often result in anxiety and feelings of isolation, self-blame and a sense of failure. Invariably, infertility takes a huge toll on a relationship particularly when a couple struggle to understand each other’s perspective. For a woman, or a couple, to feel heard, supported and be provided with some practical strategies on how to survive the emotional and hormonal IVF rollercoaster can help manage the process enormously.

Pregnancy Loss Counselling

The only way to make grief bearable is to make it important.  When a baby dies, at whatever point of gestation, the overwhelming feelings of grief can bring intense sadness, anger, shock, guilt, isolation and often a sense of failure. Pregnancy loss impacts a relationship as well as each parent individually. It is not just the loss of the baby, but often the dream or destination that pregnancy signified. Counselling can provide the safe environment for a person experiencing grief to process their loss and move forward. Memories are also incredibly important to being able to process grief. In my counselling work, I focus on the importance of validating that loss which is so often not recognised by a person’s family, friends or broader society.


Pre and post-natal anxiety and trauma

Women hope and plan for an easy conception and pregnancy and that “perfect” baby who will feed, settle and sleep but often the reality of motherhood results in a challenging experience. Having the opportunity to process the thoughts and feelings associated both with preparing for a baby’s birth or accepting a birth that was not as we had planned can help enormously. A difficult or even traumatic birth experience, sleep deprivation, loss of identity or feeling like a “failure” are just some of the very normal issues for a new mother that can create anxiety. Having an opportunity to talk about those feelings and emotions in a safe and supportive environment can normalise the experience and ease post-natal anxiety.


Adjusting to motherhood

In our society, new mothers want to be perceived as coping with whatever challenges they may be facing. This is often made worse by what I call the “motherhood myth” – the myth that the woman in your mothers’ group / family / social circle has the perfect baby. One way to break this myth is to encourage new mums to feel comfortable to say yes to support. Women need to feel more comfortable sharing their stories about motherhood – both the good and the bad. As women, we all feel better when we can talk about whatever is going on, and it can help to seek support on what practical strategies can help us to adjust to motherhood. Motherhood means a huge shift in a woman’s identity which impacts self-esteem. I really believe that creating time to be kind to yourself in whatever way you need makes such a difference.